As a veteran, it is very common to be told, “thank you for your service” throughout the year. On most days this is a welcomed reminder of the love and support that most have for the small veteran community. However, on Monday May 30 ^th, 2016, Memorial Day, please hold the urge to thank me for my service. It is not that I don’t appreciate your kind words, I just don’t want to hear them on Monday.

 Memorial Day, is a day to remember and pay homage to the fallen service members and families that gave the ultimate sacrifice. It is not a day to show your support for veterans. That day is called Veterans Day, which occurs November 11 every year.

By saying “thank you for your service” on Monday, you are simply reminding me that I was lucky enough to make it home. A lot of veterans, including myself, struggle with survivor’s guilt. Why was I able to continue on with my life while others can’t? Did I train harder to know my job, or was I just in the right place at the right time? In most cases it was the latter and pure luck. So why was I the lucky one? Am I a better person than the ones that didn’t make it home?

This is an internal never ending conversation that I have with myself on a daily basis. Over the years, I have developed ways to cope and come to an understanding of how to deal with this. Some good and some less desirable. Some times are worse than others, and other times are easier.

I am not special, and this is not a new conversation. Each veteran has their own internal battle that they face. Many are successful at handling and overcoming their inner thoughts. Unfortunately, there is also a large number who let their demons get the best of them. It is estimated that nearly 22 veterans a day commit suicide! You do the math and figure out how many more service members have died at their own hands, than at the enemies in the most recent conflicts. I assure you that the number will be staggering.

So I ask you to not thank me for my service on Monday. Instead, I ask you to remember and pay homage to the service members that never made it home. Take five minutes out of your day and think about what they did for you. I also ask you to think about the family and friends that were and still are affected by their sacrifice.

As for the rest of the year, you can thank me and feel free to buy me a beer at the local tavern. And if you see me sitting by myself somewhere, chances are I am having a deep conversation with my fallen friends. #NEVERFORGOTTEN #NEVERALONE #HONORTHEFALLEN